Lost

You ever feel like you have it all figured out?

That you’re imagined all the scenarios, devised all the backups but still feel like you’re still not ready?

You ever look at the landscape of things and wish you do something but feel restricted by things around you. Restricted by the structures. Restricted by the rules.

This in-built human design sometimes feel like flaws. It feels like it’s holding back one’s potential.

Some people no longer have those restrictions. They call them “crazy”, “different”, “weird”.

They call them out because those “crazy” people decided to break structure. They colored outside the lines. They decided to stand out in the crowd because they were being held back by conformity. They no longer wanted to become sheep. They wanted to be their own shepherd.

You ever fail at something that you try your hardest at? And when you fail, you feel like you didn’t try. You know that you didn’t try. You were confident that you would do your best. But your best failed you. How does one recover from that?

How does one recover from their best?

Their best is supposed to their limit.

I’ve tried my best. My best keeps on failing me. It’s heartbreaking. It’s tear-jerking. It’s disappointing.

There’s supposed to be blame. An exterior target.

But what do you do when your character and personality constantly make you the target. Self destruction.

It’s hard to fight when you already feel like you’ve lost.

 

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